понедельник, 20 октября 2008 г.

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I went to bed around midnight. Chris is walking the dog because he wanted to make things easier on me. Sadly it only makes me feel guilty.

There were no last minute papers in either of my boxes this morning. So no grading was necessary which was a good thing because I hit the snooze alarm a lot this morning. I am exhausted and do not want to go to work. But that is not an option.

I donapos;t understand how other people do it. When I talk about how tired I am, because someone asks, I get a lecture about how I cannot be tired because I donapos;t have kids. I get lectured that I cannot be busy because I donapos;t have kids. Or I get told that many people have more than one job because they have to pay the bills. I feel like everyone in the world is like my mother, constantly reminding me how someone else has it worse, usually the person giving the lecture.

I wasnapos;t trying to make them feel bad. They asked me question and I answered. I probably aught to learn that no one really wants to know. The answer they want is fine, or great, or some other non-threatening, non-committal answer.

I have never realized how threatening I am to others.

In other crowds I get lectured because I complain that it upsets me that I donapos;t have time for the one TV show I want to watch. Evidently I should be happy that my life is pretty devoid of TV. I should realize that I am a better person for not watching "that box." I should be happy that my time is spent productively. All that I want is one hour of mindless entertainment--why is that bad? Why am I bad for wanting it?

I guess I just need to work on my time management skills. I thought that I had a good plan this weekend so that I could go to bed a decent hour last night but I failed miserably, like I always do. Tonight I get to start doing all of the chores that I have not had time to do. There still wonapos;t be a free hour to watch my show.

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